WHEN IT COMES TO SONG LYRICS, EVEN THE EXPERTS GET IT WRONG

 By Barry Dutter

There are a lot of web sites out there that claim to offer the correct lyrics to all your favorite songs. Problem is, a lot of times, these so-called experts get the lyrics wrong.
I’m not sure why this happens. You would think that if you had a web site whose sole purpose was to provide the words to popular songs, that you would actually have some way of verifying if the lyrics were correct. Sometimes it seems like the "experts" get their lyrics the old-fashioned way -- by listening closely to the song and trying to figure out what the singer is saying.
In other words, they are guessing. Hard to believe we live in a time where all the information in recorded history is available at the touch of a button, but some jerk with a CD player is still trying to figure out exactly what Beyonce is saying in her songs.
How do I know they are getting it wrong? Because the sites contradict each other. That would not be possible if everyone was providing the correct lyrics. Even more amazing, sometimes multiple sites get the same lyric wrong in different ways. Not only are they guessing, but they’re clearly making stuff up.
My favorite example is from the movie FLASHDANCE. The movie is about a Pittsburgh girl who works as a welder by day and a dancer at night. One monster hit from the soundtrack, “Maniac,” starts off, “Just a Steeltown girl on a Saturday night…”
The first web site I checked incorrectly identified the lyric as, “Just a small town girl on a Saturday night…” Really? Pittsburgh? A small town?
The next web site I checked had it even more wrong. They said the line was “Just a still town girl on a Saturday night…”
A still town girl? What the hell is that? This girl never sits still! Did they not see the movie? She dances on a  chair and dumps a bucket of water on herself. She's the exact opposite of a still town girl! And if they were referring to the town, I think “still’ is hardly the word one would use to describe Pittsburgh!
Another 80s classic, “Jessie’s Girl,”  is perhaps best-remembered for being the only song in history to use the word “moot.” But according to one web site, the lyric actually goes, “I wanna tell her that I love her but the point is probably mute.” Really? Mute? So no one can hear it? I know this is just a typo, but it is a funny one.
Other examples: In her song “Bad Romance,” is Lady Gaga singing about her man’s “vertigo stick” or his “vertical stick?” It depends on which web site you refer to.
In Katy Perry’s “California Girls,” she sings about how she loves listening to “Snoop Doggy Dogg on the stereo.” But according to one expert web site, she is singing about “doing the dog on the stereo.” (Huh?)
Pink’s recent hit “Perfect” has one line that is so confusing, virtually every single lyrics site suggests a different line for what she is saying. As near as I can tell, the correct lyric is, “We change ourselves and we do it all the time.” But among the suggested lyrics from other “expert” web sites are: “Exchange ourselves and we do it all the time.” “Strange ourselves and we do it all the time.” “Estrange ourselves and we do it all the time.” “Stringe ourselves and we do it all the time.” (Stringe? Now they’re just making up words!)
Another Pink song, “Raise Your Glass,” contains a reference to a “penny snatcher” in the chorus. But according to several sites, the correct lyric is “panty snatcher.” Here we see how getting one word wrong can change the whole meaning of a lyric. There’s a big difference between snatching a penny and snatching someone’s panties…
In her smash hit, “Rolling in the Deep,” Adelle sings, “I will lay your shit bare,” but several web sites question whether she is actually saying, “I will lay your ship bare.”But if she is saying "ship" why is the word bleeped on some radio stations?
One of the most popular bands for people to mishear is REM. From their 80s hit, “It’s the End of the World As We Know It," the line “dont misserve your own needs” becomes “dummy serve your own needs” on one authoritative web site.
You could go on any one of these “expert” web sites and look up lyrics to any one of your favorite songs, and odds are, they got some wrong. It would be nice if these web sites actually cared about putting the correct lyrics out there, but it seems all they really care about is trying to sell you ring tones and other crap.
The Internet is a great source of information, but when it comes to song lyrics,someone is clearly not doing their homework.
I could go on and on about this, but I’m sure my complaints would fall on deaf ears.
I guess you could say my point is probably “mute.”